the golden rule

our stroller went missing recently. it was in pretty poor condition, but it was a double-seater for jogging and we used it a lot. our oldest noticed it was gone one day while a few kids from around the corner were out back. he said he'd seen a couple of them with it, so i told them all to go retrieve it. pretty brazen, i thought, to let themselves into our backyard and then take something. they barely know us.

after a couple of minutes and no sign of the kids, i decided to see what happened. i rounded the corner to find them looking a bit bewildered. no stroller. as i crossed the street asking where it was, they all began their tales. I wasn't outside, SHE was . . . NO! I was in the bathtub . . . NO, I WAS in the tub. . . well actually, I WAS the only one inside . . . then i realized the stroller wasn't taken that hour nor that day but the night before. they had removed it from our yard, left it somewhere on the sidewalk, and now it was gone.

let's just say, i was not pleased.

rewind to the night before. these same kids were racing back and forth with streams of tape pulled from a video they'd broken. our son was riding his scooter as they played and it seems at some point they started chasing him with the tape. he probably thought it was fun, until one boy wrapped the tape around his neck and wouldn't let go. our son hit him in the side to get the boy to release him. then he came home, clearly shaken.

after getting the story, kenn took our oldest back outside and made him apologize. kenn also gave a good talk to the crew of them about playing nicely. i saw from the window that it took some repeating and added sternness for the other kids to even give an ear. then, on his own, the boy who had hurt ours decided to apologize, too. breakthrough! his sister (a second-grader, mind you) actually got mad at kenn, thinking he'd forced her brother to say sorry. kenn calmly set her straight.

back to the day of the stroller. knowing it was taken in the night and i could do nothing about its whereabouts, i took a breath. what do i do now? i almost went to the kids' house to report their crime. i asked who was watching them and one said it was their mom. she was sleeping. sleeping!? i thought. her kids are running the streets and she sleeps? then something happened in me. i know now it was the Spirit within showing me what i almost missed. three precious children.

with my anger dissolving, i told them it didn't matter who took it and addressed the behavior instead. the older ones stared blankly when i asked them how they'd feel if i walked into their house and took something of theirs. so i posed the same to the youngest, who can't be more than 5. with a lisp he said, "sad!" and my heart broke a little more. then i laid down the rule. from now on, if they'd like to go in the backyard or use something of ours, they just need permission. immediately, they asked to use our basketball hoop - the one they'd already pulled from the yard moments before i had them searching for the stroller.

what else could i do? i said okay, and they skipped across the street with me in tow. i let them in our yard. i let them use the toys. and i felt really free.

that night at dinner, kenn read these upside-down commands of Jesus from Luke 6:

but i tell you who hear me: love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. if someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. if someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. do to others as you would have them do to you.